Wow. Lex will be celebrating his 4th birthday on the 17th of july.
Four years. It’s been that long already? I still remember lying on the hospital bed, with only my Mama to do all the errands. Well, not much has changed in that aspect. I’m just glad that she has endured all these years with me and Lex, hehe.
Sometimes I think about what my life would be like if I did not have Lex. And you know what I see? Nothing. I just can’t imagine life without my little rascal. I know it’s so mother-ish, but it’s true!
It’s been 4 years, and this is going to sound whiny, but man, I have never dated eversince! Well, maybe it’s because aside from my status, I haven’t been meeting a lot of people, especially in the past couple of months. I spend most of my time indoors in front of the computer. An acquaintance of mine suggested a sort of dating-networking website. I shuddered at the thought of joining that kind of online community – no offense to those who do, but I just feel scared of the idea. although I do chat with someone I have never met yet, but it’s completely different when you go out there looking. Aanyway, my colleague has been telling me to have a life, a REAL life apart from home, work and homework (hahaha). She suggested I try speed dating. Speed what? It sounded exciting, but just thinking about what kind of guys would go, *shudder*. I just can’t.
Hehe, anyway, whenever I think of having a relationship again, all I see is nothing. No one. and I don’t exactly feel sad, but I feel… relieved. Sort of. I hear my friends whine about their boyfriends and husbands, and they always tell me “at least you don’t have a headache”. Yeah, and I also don’t haveanyone to share the bills with. Ahehehe…
So as a single woman, I haven’t been having the best 4 years if you look at it at a single person’s perspective.
As a mom, I don’t know if I really qualify to be called one. I did give birth, but I don’t really feel like a mom, especially when I enjoy annoying my son to tears (I think it’s because my brothers used to annoy the hell out of me when I was a kid). It’s just fun to see how he reacts, he’s starting to feel self-conscious, and he hates it when I dance to Mickey Mouse’s hotdog dance. He’s starting to be ashamed of his mother! He won’t even let me sing the songs on Polar Express (I can’t help memorizing it since he watches the movie at least twice a week).
Sometimes I become irresponsible and Mama needs to remind me to take better care of my son. Last weekend, I was too absorbed with reading a book, that Lex had goo all over his face (he has colds). “Will you look at your son? He’s a mess!” My Mama could have whacked me with a slipper when she said that. Sigh. I don’t know if I’m acting my age lately, but it seems that I’m not.
And my son will be 4 next week! Maybe the time will come when he will start acting like an adult while I remain acting like a child. That will be fun. Sometimes I feel like it’s already happening. Haha!
Sigh. Fourth year.
I’m just glad that all the drama is over. Which reminds me, Voldemort said he would try to take Lex out for his birthday. Hmm. Do senators grant their aides some day off?



