while I'm waiting…

Having a drink with my colleague who is sort of confused and heartbroken and I don’t know what else. Laiza, honestly, I can just bang your head on a wall. But then, after the bruise heals, you’d still long for him. Ugh.

Then again, if you do, you’d have to pay me P2,000. Hahaha.

I love making bets.

Hahaha.

Hello friends, welcome to my new blog. My blog posts from 2006 to 2009 are still up at zahflo.wordpress.com

This blog was brought about by a decision on my part to move my blog to a new web host, but moving the entire blog was gonna take a lot of work. Since the year is about to end, and life for me has changed since I started blogging, I decided to start anew.

My old blog was created when I was at the (second) lowest point of my life (the lowest point of my life happened when I was waay younger). Anyway, that was the point in my life when I felt my future faded, my heart was broken and the responsibility of raising my son alone was dumped on my shoulders. That was the time I stopped believing in love. But while I became cynical about romantic relationships, I held on to God and his angels (aka friends), because I had to live. I had given up hope, but when I saw my son, I just had to live. Maybe God designed the situation in such a way that I would have no choice but to survive, because had “he” left me while I was pregnant, it would have been easier to give up and say goodbye to the world.

And so my blog became my therapy, and along the way, it has led me to healing. I met new people – bloggers and lurkers alike. I have found acceptance and understanding especially from fellow mommy bloggers who know the road that I am taking, and they inspire me to become a better mom. And I am blessed, in a way, to have shared my heart with someone in a similar situation, and is now living with the peace of mind that her child has been acknowledged by the father, without having to go through the stress and pain that I went through.

So, with all these, I move on to the next phase of my life, which is now filled with hope. I still have my insecurities and doubts, but I have again opened my heart to the possibility of finding love. Whether I am loved back or not, it doesn’t matter. I now choose to love regardless of what I get (or do not get) in return. I have learned along the way that losing the one you love does not mean love is lost. It is there, just waiting to find a home. And if my life on earth ends and my heart has not found a home yet, then it still has a place in God’s house when He welcomes me there.

Welcome to my new life – a life of possibilities and beginnings. I have had wonderful memories in the past, but I am certain of one thing: the best is yet to come.

Love. Learn. Live!