while I'm waiting…

Lex had a blast at Active Fun, SM North Edsa branch. I was glad to be invited to a mommy blogger’s invitational event (yes it was for free) to go and enjoy a few hours at Active Fun, a play area for kids wherein you can leave them while the adults take their time shopping. Of course, one adult should stay to supervise the kids, although Active Fun has its own staff that watches over the kids, and are positioned in spots within the play area to make sure the kids are safe at all times.

There is a big slide, a pool of balls, and several other play things for different age groups. There is also a party area where kids can hold their birthday parties. Active Fun offers birthday party packages, much like the ones available in fast food chains, except that aside from the party, the kids have a chance to use the play area.

Anyway, here are photos taken by fellow mom blogger, Chats, since I didn’t have a camera that time.

Lex poses for a second (thanks Chats for taking the shot!)

After that fun time, Lex had dinner in Jollibee and I had to carry him when we walked the sky garden of SM North. That was a long walk, and it was past 9pm, so I had to carry Lex since he was exhausted. Good thing I ate that banana! Haha!

Hopefully we get to go on the next invitational (it’s pretty impractical for us to travel from Marikina to SM North just to play there). Well, I will keep my radars up for the next mommy bloggers event! I’m back in the circuit! Yey!

Cess, Lisa, Julie, Lynn (thanks for the photo, Lynn!)

I was with these mom bloggers that Friday night:
Chats aka imom
Teacher Julie
Cess
Cookie
Lynn
Feng (on blog leave hehe)

Thanks to Apple, the branch owner of Active Fun SM North, for having us there!

Check out the Active Fun website to see what’s in store for parents and kids on Active Fun’s first anniversary!

fun!

I barely knew my grandfather (my father’s dad). All I know is that he was a World War II veteran, eventually became part of the Philippine Army and retired as an Army Captain. I have learned more about him recently when we were “reunited” with the rest of the Bacani clan, since my uncles have spent a lot of time with him.

One thing I remember about him was that he traveled from Ilocos Sur to Cavite (around 400 plus km., and more than 10 hrs. bus ride) to visit my brother, and that he was the one who was there during my brother’s wedding in my father’s place (we were still not in good terms with my father that time). And during that time, when our family had a crisis, my grandfather GAVE me his bank book so I could withdraw his pension money EVERY MONTH and help us out financially. It was not really a huge amount but he was living off his pensions and he had to give up one of them. I guess, in a way, it is his way of compensating for having a (once) irresponsible son (sorry Papa, you know that’s true hehe).

Anyway, recent events in the family has inspired my cousin to rummage through his mom’s old photos, scanned them and posted them on Facebook. Here, I share some of the photos of my grandfather, the highly respected (but almost forgotten) Capt. Juan Bacani.

My uncle’s comment on FB: “uncle john must be in college here, enrolled at centro escolar also takin dentistry. second year college siya when WWII broke up. he was recruited. lolo hugo and dad just learned about it thru relatives. the next time they saw him was at death march. classic no?”

My uncle’s comment on FB: “i think this is in fort magsaysay, uncle john was assigned in tabak division of the army”

(Written at the back)
Dec. 31, 1966
“Scene was taken in front of Saigon Catholic Cathedral. Jeep is a PHILCAG, one driven by a Sgt. Reyes whom I requested to make the shot. It is in this vicinity where Filipinos by the hundreds meets and stroll especially after Sunday mass. Saigon”

(Written at the back)
Saigon, Vietnam Dec. 21/1967
“To Emy,

Love Daddy”
(Emy is my father’s youngest sister)

With this photo, my father’s cousin, Tito Willie recalled how Lolo Juan showed his concern for the family: “when he was long retired from the service i was asking him to give me his 45cal…this is what he told me (translated from Kapampangan to Tagalog) ‘Loko, nuong galing ako ng Vietnam nag-uwi ako ng baril, kahit gaano pa..di ko inisip na bigyan ko kayo ng baril..ngayon pa!..hindi nyo kailangan ng baril..husto na.. na ako na lang ang humawak ng baril sa mga Bacani’ (When I went back from Vietnam I brought home guns, but even then I didn’t think of giving you one. You do not need it. It is enough that I am last of the Bacani’s to hold a gun.)

(Written at the back)
“Saigon, Vietnam.
Daddy in his rugged attire. This is where I stay and live. Our billet is not seen in picture. It is very cold now. The temperature is 14F. I am wearing a sweater and a leather jacket.”

I may be biased, but hey, my grandfather IS gorgeous, isn’t he?

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Thank you, Lolo Juan, for your memories. And thank you, my uncles and aunts, for sharing his memories with us!

We celebrated Lex’s fifth birthday yesterday, July 17. It’s been five years already? It seemed like it was just yesterday when I had my caesarian section that is similar to this video.

ready to blow the candle - after playing outside

Anyway, I am thankful for the five years, and the nine months prior to that. I never imagined how it would be after Lex’s birth. all I knew was I wasn’t prepared for any of it.

I am really grateful to God for Lex’s life – it has somehow “forced” me to see beyond myself and actually live and look forward to the future. I am amazed at how Lex is turning out. He is really eager to learn more in school, and everywhere else (sometimes it can be annoying), and he has become so sweet that it’s easy to forgive him when he’s all naughty and bad.

His fifth birthday celebration went out really well, considering that this inexperienced mom didn’t prepare well for it (hehe). We cooked the usual birthday food – spaghetti, hotdogs, chicken, lumpiang shanghai, and the birthday treats – cake and ice cream! then my collague came by with her family, and as promised, she hosted some games for the kids, who really had fun.

Lex enjoyed all his gifts, and is more sociable now, so he was really game with the pictures, and he greeted each visitor that came by, and he said goodbye as they left. And I think he really enjoyed all the attention.

Lex’s dad called up in the afternoon to greet him. I handed the phone to Lex, who only said ‘hello’, then shoved the phone away. Unfortunately, I had to listen to his dad sing ‘happy birthday’, hahaha. As always, he ‘promised’ to take Lex out the ‘next time’ he’s ‘available’.

Anyway, the night ended with left over spaghetti and cake that will last us for several days, depending on our appetite hehe. Today, I will be taking Lex out for Timezone and maybe a movie if he feels like it, and to get him his new clothes, care of the father who is now in far away Basilan.

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I am glad to note that this year is unfolding with a lot of surprises and new things – VERY new things, that leaves me awed and excited at the same time. I’m not sure of what the future holds, but I know that several little choices can lead to something really wonderful – something I have always prayed for, hoped for, longed for. And as they say, nothing of value is easy. So while chasing this new dream may be VERY inconvenient, emotionally draining and unsure, I think the risk is worth it. Besides, in a blink of an eye, Lex will be 15, and I, 40. Gosh, I would have liked to have done something really significant in between!

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Most of the single moms I knew, who eventually found their current husbands, started seriously dating again after their kids turned five. And now I’m wondering, is it my time as well?

Haha, well, we never know.

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All in all, I am looking forward to more birthday celebrations for Lex.

Thank you for coming over: my good friend Meong and his wonderful family Heide and Ivy, Ms. Lorie (from Lex’s school), my cousin Irene, the neighborhood kids Niel, Mikey and sister, and Ian, UPSCAns Margie, Louise and Nanette with little Lina, my colleagues Atty. Grace and her family, Arvin, Thea and Julian, the ‘late’ Laiza (hehe kidding, she was late), and of course my big bro Cris and his son Grendel. And always grateful for my Mama and our kasambahay, Dedeng.

Thank You, Lord, for these angels in our lives!

Do you ever wonder why a wake becomes a family reunion, when in fact you have attempted to invite family for gatherings – weddings, birthdays, baptisms, etc. – and they never come. When someone dies, everyone comes.

Anyway, this time, it was our turn to show up. See, my siblings and I never met our father’s side of the family when we were growing up. I’m not sure why, but maybe because we spent 8 years in Davao and by the time we went back to Luzon, my father didn’t give much thought about introducing us to the rest of the family.

My uncle found me on Facebook. Can you believe it? And I was thrilled to see people who I share my family name with. Finally, I belong somewhere! So just last month we met them in a family gathering and I was overwhelmed at all my cousins – there were a lot of them I couldn’t remember their names.

Then my grand aunt passed away, and it was an opportunity to meet them again. What was amazing to me was – the wake and the funeral was the most peaceful and “happy” one I’ve been. My uncles and aunt were not exactly sad, but they were emotional when they reminisced about how wonderful their mother was. And it was a blessing to a lot of us. To get a glimpse of the life this woman lived – for her family. hearing the eulogy that my aunt prepared gave me an idea of how mothers and wives should be. And even if I’m practically a stranger in that wake (because I barely know them – we just met a month ago!), I felt like somehow, I have found a family to emulate. That somehow, if Lexx asks me how a normal family looks like, I can tell him about my uncles’ family and he will understand what I mean.

That night was special for me because after a long time, my brothers and I were able to spend a few hours with my father and the rest of the family. There were no long talks or whatever. Mostly there were just hi’s hello’s how are you’s. But it was enough.

I can’t exactly describe the feeling, but it was like meeting people for the first time but you feel like you’ve known them all your life. It didn’t feel weird for me to stay with them the whole day.

Maybe it’s because as far as I know, we didn’t owe them, and they didn’t owe us, anything. So the feeling was light. Unlike with my other family, it feels odd living with them, because we owe them a lot. I’m not being ungrateful. Just that I didn’t feel too welcome because I was an added burden. Which I’m probably not, but that’s how I felt at that time.

Anyway, my point is, I am glad. My Lex wouldn’t be missing out too much on not “belonging” to his father’s family (it’s a relief for me), because just with my mother’s and father’s sides of the family – he can already say he’s got enough love.

Bacani Family

with my Papa and Kuyas

blessed with 2 nuns, a pastor and a bishop in the family

*thanks, Tito Mon, for the photos

first day of school, June 2010

My little baby boy just started kindergarten this week. Last Monday, I brought him to school, which is just around 3 houses away from ours. He was the second student to arrive (the first one is the teacher’s daughter), and as soon as he came in, the little girl pulled him inside the classroom to play. So I left without saying goodbye (huhuhu). Later in the evening, he just told me they played in school.

Although I didn’t really get emotional with the “first phase of letting go”, if you will, I gave it a lot of thought. Lex is turning 5 years old this July, and thinking back, I am amazed at how fast the years went by. Wasn’t it just yesterday that I felt him move inside my belly? (ok, when I start thinking about that, I get emotional).

And now he decides on what to wear. I can’t force him to wear what I think is appropriate – he wears what HE wants. So this morning, Friday, is supposed to be their P.E. day. So he has to wear a white T shirt and green jogging pants. He didn’t want to, he insisted to wear the regular uniform. So Lex and my mom argued for a few minutes, until my mom got frustrated and screamed “ARE YOU GOING TO SCHOOL OR NOT???!!!”, to which Lex just replied with a smirk, his hands on his waist and his foot tapping on the floor. Seriously, it was annoying! He is soooo stubborn. So I tried forcinghim to wear the T-shirt. He pulled it off and squirmed away and shouted “NO!!!”.

So he ended up wearing the regular uniform, and he had to change when he got to school and saw his other classmates wearing the jogging pants. Huh!

There have been a lot of times when I found myself actually TRYING to negotiate with Lex. I can’t believe how difficult it is to convince a 4 year old. How many more years do I have to do this? Gosh.

But at the end of the day, I am thankful for his life, and the amazing things he can do. This is just the first week of school. Huh!

Special thanks to my mom, who has been the one helping Lex with his homework and everything else. I think I’m doing a good job as a dad, except for the part where Lex is supposed to be intimidated by my presence. My brother does that – tell him in a deep, firm voice to “finish your food”.

Anyway, next week I’ll be home most times, and I guess I can have my chance to be a mom.

My aunt posted our old photos on Facebook, and I was so overwhelmed. I am glad that my Mama used to mail our photos to my grandfather, and now, I have no idea whether we till have copies of those, but a stack of the old photos are still in my grandmother’s house in Ilocos. I am glad to remember that I did have photos with my grandfather, years before he passed away. And of course, I am amused with my baby photos that show how bald I was as a kid. Hahaha!

My brothers and I

on a guava tree

with cousins, my brothers and Lolo Juan and Lola Pat

twins?

 Another one of my brother’s artwork.   I was supposed to have my own triplets version, but the camera moved a bit and it was ruined. Anyway, my bro also made this nice photo of Lex.   Nice no?

Okay, so I’ve been putting off blogging about this year’s Earth hour, and I ended up stuck at home with Lex. I was hoping we could join an event in the city. But anyway, regardless, we still turned off the lights, the TV and the fridge. I was planning to switch off the main breaker, but I can’t bear the heat and the mosquitoes, so Lex and I are in front of my netbook and an electric fan, watching video clips. I’ve explained to Lex why we’re turning off the lights and he seems to understand that we have to switch off the lights.

Last year, the Philippines topped the number of towns and cities that participated in the event, and the country actually saved 611 megawatt-hours of energy (and since it lasted only 1 hour, so it’s 611 MW capacity), which is equivalent to the largest coal fired power plant in the country. Imagine, it’s like shutting down one coal fired power plant!

I wonder how much we will be saving this year? (tho in the Philippines, some areas have forced outages anyway because of power shortage due to the dry season). Aanyway. I can’t believe it’s almost 9:30 pm.

Earth hour 2010 with Lex

2006

I drift, I burn, I fly
When you sing lullabies
I’m helpless, I’m yearning
I’m like the putty in your hands

Save me from this place
Heaven knows I’m falling
For you, my sweet embrace
Heaven Knows
Heaven knows I’ve been waiting for you
Waiting for you

The Pandas with Coach Ali - 2009